Ratty arrived all the way from Edinburgh, Scotland. He came in a brown padded parcel about 10 days before Christmas, 2009. I know he was in the parcel because I could smell him as he was stuffed with “the nip”! HuMum explained it was my very own special present sent by my darling Tikka (@ickle_tikkypoo) who I had met when I arrived at my forever home and was allowed to talk with her on-line when huMum was sleeping or shopping. We quickly fell in love and declared to the world our catbianism and we hope that, very soon, our elected Purrime Ministerettes, @ShivaandJaya, will have the Australian Purrliament agree to same-sex marriages. I’m not sure that Tikka’s dad (@Nav_Nikerless) is all that keen to learn his darling tortoiseshell Tikka is a catbian but he knows how much we love each other!
Back to my parcel containing Ratty; well it sat on the desk as huMum said it was a surprise for me and not to be opened until Christmas morning in Scotland. Humph! Not only did I have to wait 10 days, but then I had to wait 11 more hours. I threw up my paws in frustration and huffed out of the office to go hunting with my hoodies. When the house was dark and I could hear huMum snoring I snuck back into the office to open my present! I chewed it, clawed it, pounded it with my back feet but, for the life of me, I could not find a way into it. Tikka had got her dad to seal it with staples and yucky tasting tape. I gave up at about 7:00am and joined huMum, on our bed, for a nap. A blink of eye later I was awoken by this loud scream, “Jessie what have you been up to?” “Who me, nothing, nothing at all, I’ve been sleeping here all night till you rudely woke me!” I replied with my wide-eyed innocent look. No breakfast treats for me that morning and yet another hour on the naughty chair! The next time I was allowed in the office the parcel was missing and, although I searched the house from top to bottom, I could not find it.
Christmas day was fun even if huMum left me alone for about six hours when she went out to feed her face at a party. She had bought me lots of new toys to play with so, between naps, I shredded the wrapping paper all over the living room floor and then I gradually moved my presents up to our bed so I could snuggle them.
HuMum got home just in time to feed me the contents of the “cattybag” she’d brought for me. Real prawns and thick ham cut off the bone! I ate, burped, and ate some more. I was so disgustingly full of food I wondered if my tummy would ever return to its original shape. In the meantime, huMum had turned on computer and was chatting with Nav, she called me in so I could have a few minutes with my darling Tikka but we were disturbed by the arrival of my gift. It just magically appeared! I typed to let Tikka know that her parcel had been found and huMum was opening it for me. Oh the excitement and the joy of finally meeting Ratty. He was about 6 inches long, furry, beady eyes and nose made of cotton, plus leather ears and a satin tail. Best of all he was stuffed full of “the nip”. I was speechless, abruptly said goodbye to Tikka, jumped off the desk with Ratty in my mouth and went off to bed to explore him in-depth. It only took me thirty seconds to be as “high as a kite” and seeing the world through rose-coloured glasses, or was that the sunset?
I don’t know if it was “the nip” or the fact that ratty was the perfect size to fight with, but it took me three days to get rid of his ears and tail. He was defenceless against my continued onslaught. Every night, if I didn’t catch a real mouse, I would take my temper out on Ratty. Within two weeks I had degutted him! I can’t count the number of times this year that huMum has patiently sewn Ratty back together but, just last week, we had to finally admit he was beyond repair and he was buried in the garbage bin.
I mourned him and yowled every night until huMum arrived home with Fluffy. Now this is one very big solidly constructed mouse! Three days with her and I have just managed to shred a few tiny cotton threads from her towelling rope tail. To be perfectly honest she’s not nearly as much fun as Ratty, thus my letter to Santa has included a request for another Ratty (plus ping-pong balls and a laser pointer) and we are going to mail it tomorrow. HuMum has told me that I will only get my wishes granted if I’m very good so tonight I bought her the first mouse of the summer season and when that disappeared into the rubbish bin I replaced it with a moth!
Nap time, bye-bye for now!